Reverend Slain

One summer afternoon while I was living in Hawaii and attending community college in the late 90's, I was sitting next to a man at a bus stop who looked to be in his 30's, had long hair, wore a cowboy hat and carried a walking stick. He introduced himself to me as "Reverend Slain." He told me about a church he had started, and asked me if I was interested in joining. I smirked and said something along the lines of "I'm not interested in joining a cult," to which he replied "It's not a cult, it's a church," which is what they all say. We then talked about music, and he told me how much enjoyed the debut album by Bow Wow Wow, and that he only needed to listen to albums for a few weeks before giving them away to someone else, because he could then just play the songs back in his head.


A few weeks later as school was starting, I saw him walking around this little area on campus where students would congregate. Apparently he was there to take a few classes. He had painted his eyes black, because ya know, first day of school and all. I walked up to him and I said, "Hey Reverend!" He was like, "Remember my name? Reverend SLAAAINNN," and as he was saying the word "slain," he made a slow throat-slashing gesture with his thumb. The other students went silent and just sort of looked at him. I don't think I saw him again after that.