Things That are Geeky, and What You Should Do Instead

Geek: Looking both ways before crossing the street.

Instead: Just cross the street, you don't want to be a geek.


Geek: Saying "They can't come to the phone right now" when a stranger calls your house.

Instead: Everyone knows that "can't come to the phone" shit means your mom isn't home. You might as well invite the kidnappers over and leave the front door unlocked. Defiantly state, "She isn't here," or make something up, just don't be vague about it.


Geek: Calling home to tell your parents where you are.

Instead: Fuck that, just go to your friend's house after school and come home when you want. Do you want your friend to make fun of you?


Geek: Doing your homework first, so you get it out of the way.

Instead: Watch cartoons as soon as you get home.


Geek: Having milk with dinner.

Instead: Drink pop with dinner.


Geek: Eating breakfast before school.

Instead: Nothing's cooler than saying "I didn't eat breakfast this morning," it shows that you're independent, and it sounds grown-up.


Geek: Coming in from recess as soon as the bell rings.

Instead: You want to milk as much time as possible, your class isn't going anywhere.